Bedtimes and Pyjama Times are causing trouble for Gertrude

Does anyone have a solution to Gertrude's dilemma? A dose of Castor oil will be awarded for the best answer.

My seventeen-year-old son Robert has an earlier bedtime than his sisters despite the fact they are both younger than him. They are just aged fourteen and twelve and because they are female, are far more mature than he is. My son’s bedtime was 6:00 pm with his pyjama time preparation beginning at 5:15 pm. I expected him to be in his nightclothes by 5:30 pm. These consist of traditional cosy winceyette pyjamas. These are especially sewn by a friend in the style a very young boy might wear, as I do not consider him mature enough for, “big boys pyjamas”.

At weekends his routine varies. On Saturday his sisters invariably stay with friends and since I am softhearted I allow him to stay up until 6.30 pm, just in time to say night-night to Nana and Auntie Beatrice, my mother and sister who visit at that time. On Sunday, since it is school the next day he is bathed and ready for bed by 4:00 pm and safely tucked up no more than a half an hour later. Weekday’s, since I usually have not returned from work by 5:15 pm it befalls upon his sisters to ensure he adheres to his pyjama discipline. They oversee his supper, making sure he washes his own dirty dishes. They then supervise his nightly bath, a bone of contention as he considers it embarrassing for a seventeen-year-old to be bathed by his sisters. It took several smacked botties for him to finally realise I was not going to give way upon this matter and he now acquiesces without making a fuss.

The girls then assist with the choice of and the donning of his little boy pyjamas. I am always home in time to take him up to bed as I think that is very important for a boy of his age to have mummy there to tuck him in and kiss him night-night. Now that he is about to turn eighteen he requested that his bedtime should be moved to seven o’clock. Upon consideration I agreed to a trial period to begin immediately. Unfortunately that is where my trouble began.

My son was under the impression that a later bedtime also meant his pyjama time being put back an hour until 6:15 pm. This was not the agreement. When I arrived home I found my daughters had spanked him and gave him corner time when he refused to get ready for bed at his usual time. They had also dressed him in his special, “naughty boy pyjamas,” his footed teddy bear patterned pyjamas with a Peter Pan collar that he absolutely hates wearing. Amidst his tear-stained face and his sisters accusations and recriminations, the best I could do was pack him off to bed there and then.

I now find that my daughters were unhappy about spoiling our evenings together, they feel the best place for my son is to be tucked up in bed at his usual time and to continue letting them get him ready for bed, choosing his jim-jams etc. I have, for the moment reverted back to a 6 pm bedtime for my son which is something he is obviously not happy with but I do not wish to undermine my daughter’s authority over their brother.

Your advice on the matter would be most appreciated.
Gertrude Kirchgarten.



Carry on as usual. Letting allowing a later bedtime shows him you are willing to compromise and lose control. You must not slacken your disciplinary measures. I know my brother deserves to be treated like a naughty little boy. 

Kelly-Anne


Dear Gertrude;

Congratulations on your treatment of your errant son. How dare he act up in the presence of young ladies and girls? You were right to put him to bed immediately without dinner. After school, he should be bathed and dressed in pyjamas before his supper. Ideally you should let his sisters put him to bed too, with blinds and curtains tightly closed. Bedtimes should never be altered.

Janice Oryan


Dear Aunt Gertrude;

I am delightful to hear that your seventeen-year-old son is treated as the naughty boy he undoubtedly is. There is no harm in making him wear pyjamas that a child much younger than he is would wear as it will  teach him that "when you behave like a child, you get treated like one".
Certainly his defiance must be dealt with. His sisters are obviously more mature than he and as such it is only natural that they help in getting him ready for bed. I wish you well with your efforts and do please let us know what decisions you come to.

Sincerely

Hettie Wainwright



Well I must say my son appears to have taken leave of his senses. On Saturday his Nana and Aunt Beatrice arrived unexpectedly early. With them was eleven-year-old Alice who was being looked after by my sister. Alice immediately shouted out a cry of recognition. It appeared she was in the first year of my son’s school. My son of course had no knowledge of such a junior pupil. Since though they were fellow pupils, I suggested a game of ‘Ring a Rosie’s’ for the pair of them, and indeed, Alice was soon laughing and enjoying herself. My seventeen-year-old son for some reason appeared to be less than enthusiastic and I had to remind him to fall down on more than one occasion.

At 5:15 pm I went upstairs to select a pair of pyjamas for my son to wear, I was going to put him into his yellow Teddy-Bear pyjamas as he looks so cute in them but instead I selected his blue, Cowboy and Indian jim-jams as a reward for being a good boy.

 As I approached the pair I told my son it was time for him to be put into his jimmy-jams and informed Alice that they could play a less boisterous game before his bed-time once he was all pyjamaed. Imagine my surprise when he flatly refused to have his clothes removed, spouting nonsense such as he was to old to go to bed so early and that he was a big boy and wanted big boy pyjamas. You can imagine the shock I felt at being shown up in such a manner in front of my sister and mother.

I was so angry it took me no time to remove his shorts and pull down his underwear putting him across my lap for a spanking. He was not at all pleased to be spanked in front of everyone but I ignored his tears and sent Alice off to his room to retrieve his Teddy-Bear pyjamas.  When she returned my son was in full-blown tantrum mode and I had to elicit help from his Nana and Aunt to remove the remainder of his clothing as he tearfully wriggled and squirmed to avoid our grasp.

’How do you like these pyjamas then you naughty little boy?’ I asked, as Beatrice and I held his legs while his Nana manoeuvred his legs into his pyjama bottoms. There were more frantic efforts to escape as he realised he was being put into his most babyish brushed cotton pyjamas emblazoned with Teddy-Bears. We held him as my mother buttoned him into the pyjama top, fastening the top button to enhance the effect of the pretty Peter Pan collar. How he sobbed as I made him kiss everyone night-night, including Alice before asking her to help me tuck him into bed even though it was only 4:30pm.

Do you think I have been too harsh on him or perhaps too lenient? 

Your opinions are always welcome

Gertrude Kirchgarten.