One of Nanny Smackbottoms replies from an edition of Pyjama Punishment Monthly. I have added the examples of the type of girl/boy pyjamas that Nanny Smackbottom recommends Simon be dressed in.

Dear Nanny Smackbottom

I would like to begin pyjama punishing my nephew Simon

and start to get him used to having an early bedtime.

Could you please give me a few tips about how to begin 

such a regime?

Yours truly

Margaret Faversham

You must begin by making Simon wear little boy’s

or little girl’s pyjamas at night, no exceptions.

If he doesn’t already have at least two pairs of

little boys or little girl’s pyjamas, take him to

buy some. Make sure the assistant is certain the

pyjamas are for him and get her to advise on the 

style and colour. Preferably holding the pyjama 

jacket up against him in full view of other customers.

Ensure that he wear the chosen pyjamas to bed every 

night so he gets used to putting them on regularly by 

default.  

The point is to train him to a point whereby his pyjama

punishment becomes second nature. Out of fear of your

reaction, he should never think about wearing anything

else but childish pyjamas, even when you are not there

to enforce it.

You should make a rule that he must be wearing his

pyjamas by a certain time each day depending on when

you have set his bedtime. This time should be adhered

to regardless of who is present. (I recommend a pyjama

time of 3 pm and a bedtime no later than 6 pm), of

course the decision is ultimately up to the individual.

Take every opportunity to tell him how cute, sweet or 

ridiculous he looks in his pyjamas depending on whether

you are using positive reinforcement or negative 

reinforcement technique. 

Generally only you will be involved in the

pyjama/bedtime scenario, If however you have 

visitors around let his pyjama time approach 

and do not prompt him that he should be fetching

his pyjamas. He will think that you have either

forgotton or are being lenient because guests are

present. No such thing. Once his pyjama time has past,

scold him and send a guest to fetch his pyjamas while

you make him undress. Insist he puts his pyjamas on 

in front of everyone or button him into the pyjama

top yourself and step him into the pyjama bottoms.

Then immediately put him over your knee for a 

spanking to reinforce that he will be punished 

every time he does not put on his pyjamas when 

he should. Once the spanking is over get him to

say good night to your guests, it’s an excellent

way to humiliate him further. 

Remember that for this punishment regime to work

you must be very strict in enforcing it 

rigidly and not to make any exceptions.

Please let me know how you progress with Simon.

Nanny Smackbottom.

A set of early bedtime rules for all those naughty girls out there.

Mummy’s New Conduct Rules for her Naughty little Girl

Dear Karen

Mummy has witnessed a dramatic increase in unacceptable behavior from you over the past five years.  She can no longer sit by and watch you keep making poor decisions for yourself.

Even though you are eighteen, she has determined that the only way to help you back on the right path is to take most of the decision-making processes out of your hands.  Mummy will now make all the decisions on how you behave at home and in public, just like when you were her little girl.

You will comply with these rules at all times. 

You will behave properly at all times.  Failure to do so will result in punishment from Mummy.

Any additional monetary expenses that are required to comply with these rules are your responsibility.

These rules are not meant to replace the rules that Mummy taught you when you were little.  These are a supplement to them and obeyed from this moment on.

The following rules will remain in full effect for you till the evening of

December 31, 2013. 

The rules Mummy has specified for you in this document may be modified slightly over time, as Mummy deems necessary, but the essence of the rule may not be revoked until that date.

At that time, Mummy will re-evaluate your need for a revised set of rules from her. 

She will likely decide on one of the following for you

1.To impose a new set of rules for you that will last till at least December 31, 2020.

2. That you do not require the imposition of Mummy’s rules anymore.
3. That this set of rules will continue with a new review date.

General rules for adults that act like children

The following list is a general set of rules that Mummy wishes for you to follow from now on.

You will always refer to her as “Mummy”. 

You will refer to other adults as aunty and uncle. Adults are deemed to be anyone of age fourteen and above. Therefore you would refer to your fourteen-year-old cousin Jenny as Aunty Jennifer.

Anyone below that age will be addressed by his or her given name.  You are not permitted to use the more familiar version or contractions of anyone’s name; this is to demonstration of respect for them.

Whenever Mummy asks you a question, your answer is to be as truthful and complete as possible.  Any evasion of the complete truth will require Mummy to spank you. This is a suitable punishment for misbehaviour and will be mummy’s regular method of punishment along with early bedtimes. 

No drinking of any type of alcohol or coffee is permitted.

You will be escorted to work each morning and collected each afternoon to return home. If you leave the house for any other reason it will be under the supervision of mummy or a suitable adult selected by mummy.

Whenever you do leave the house Mummy will check you are suitably dressed, your face and hands are presentable and your hair is combed properly.

General Restrictions now in effect for adults that behave like children.

Mummy will decide on your clothes.  Anything she doesn’t approve of will be thrown out or given to a charity shop.

 

Mummy will decide your hairstyle.  She favors short hair for you, put in a pony- tail or braids.  Hair coloring, highlighting or tinting of your hair is no longer permitted.  Your hair will remain its natural brown from now on.

You will not be allowed to watch television or use the computer at all during your period of supervision.  A small amount of radio may be listened to but only with Mummy’s approval and strict supervision.

All books must be appropriate for a five-year-old.  If a five-year-old would not be permitted to view or listen to the material, neither will you.

Mealtime rules for adults that act like children

You will assist Mummy in the preparation of all meals from now on.

Milk or water is the only liquid you are allowed to consume at mealtimes.  Nothing else is permitted.

You will wear a babies bib or a suitably infantile pinafore at mealtimes. 

All liquids will be consumed in a baby bottle or spill-proof cup.

Mummy will decide what you will eat. You will now carry a prepared lunch to work each day.  Other meals outside the home are forbidden.

No eating or drinking of anything outside the house is permitted without Mummy’s permission.

All snacking between meals is now forbidden.

Nighttime bath preparation rules for adults that act like children

Every night you will take either a bath or shower. 

The general schedule is as follows

Shower                     Monday - Thursday

Bath                          Friday - Sunday

Mummy will give you a 1-quart enema every Saturday night.

You will go to bed wearing nightgown or pyjamas, nappies and plastic pants.

You will sit on the potty before bedtime.

On the rare occasion we are out visiting past your bedtime you will still be prepared for bed wearing nightgown or pyjamas, nappies and plastic pants that you will have carried with you in your “nighty-night bag”. Your “nighty-night bag” will also contain your teddy bear, a toothbrush and toothpaste and your potty. You will carry your ”nighty-night bag” during all non-working excursions from the house.

Nappy time rules to be applied whenever you are prepared for bed wearing nappies.

Your bed will be fitted with a rubber sheet and little girl bedding.

You will make regular use of a baby’s dummy.

Bedroom rules for adults that act like children.

Mummy will buy new furniture and redecorate your room to make it more appropriate for a little girl of your age.  

You will now sleep cuddling a teddy.

Bed times for naughty adults that act like children.

Mummy noticed that you have trouble going to bed at any sort of reasonable hour.  Not getting sufficient sleep every evening has made you irritable and caused you significant and frequent problems at your job. 

When you were little, Mummy made sure you had enough sleep by putting you to bed at an appropriate time each night. Because you obviously cannot handle the responsibility of choosing a suitable bedtime for yourself, Mummy has taken the liberty of constructing a list of nightly bedtimes for you. 

The following bedtime schedule should solve your problem of not getting enough sleep fairly quickly.

The bedtimes listed below are just a first draft for Mummy.  If she feels they need to be adjusted to an even earlier time she will not hesitate to do so.

           

Once Mummy has put you to bed, you are to remain in bed till Mummy comes to get you the next morning.

Your New Bedtimes

Monday - Thursday Evenings                                          5:30 pm

Friday Evenings                                                         6:30 pm

Saturday Evenings                                                         6:00 pm

Sunday afternoon                                

                        4:00 pm

The bedtimes listed above will be in effect for you year-round including holidays and when you are on holiday.

Please note that these are your actual bedtimes, you will be prepared for bed, that is in pyjamas or nightgown, nappies and plastic pants, at least an hour before the listed bedtime.

Mummy can send her little girl to bed any time she pleases.  The times above are the latest times that you will normally be going to bed on the above nights.

Mummy has noted that in the past you are especially prone to inappropriate bedtimes around the holidays, so she has made a special set of bedtimes to govern them. 

Good Friday, Easter Saturday and Easter Sunday

Your bedtime on the above days will be at 5:00 p.m.  

Mummy will be giving you an extra hard spanking at bedtime on each of the days above.

The Entire Week following Easter

Your bedtime on the above days is 5:00 p.m.  

Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve

Your bedtime on the above days is 4:30 pm  

Mummy will be giving you an extra hard spanking at bedtime on each of the days above.

Christmas Day and New Year’s Day

Your bedtime on the above days is 4:30 p.m.

Special Night Time Wear for Adults that Act Like Children

Naughty adults that act like children forfeit the privilege of selecting the nightclothes that they wear to bed.

The only type of nightclothes fabric that Mummy will permit you to wear is cosy winceyette all year-round.  Five pairs of pink floral winceyette footed pyjamas with a drop down seat in the back have been ordered as well as three full length winceyette nightgowns that button at the back and have long sleeves with elasticated frilled cuffs. Mummy feels that this type of nightwear will make you more compliant in regards to bedtimes.

General Punishments for Adults that Act Like Children

When you were younger Mummy used to punish you using a variety of methods.  If you misbehaved enough to warrant a punishment from Mummy, the punishment would most likely be one or more of the following.

1. Spanking
2. Corner Time
3. Sent to Bed Early
4. Mouth Washed Out with Soap

These methods proved their effectiveness when Mummy used them in the past.  Since we have decided to return you to your younger self these punishments will be reinstated with additional methods.

The first method Mummy will use to punish you is giving you a long hard spanking. 

Mummy plans to be strict with regards to your conduct at all times now.  Step out of line and you go over mummy’s knee for a bare bottomed nursery style spanking.

You will then follow your bedtime regime and be dressed in pyjamas or nightgown, nappies and plastic baby pants and put to bed immediately, no matter who is present at the time.   

Mummy has decided that a weekly schedule of spankings will provide you with the best chance for success.

Please understand that the weekly spankings listed below are for past misbehavior, not for present or future misbehavior.  Mummy will give you additional hard spankings for any new misbehavior that you commit.    

From now on, you can expect a weekly set of spankings from Mummy according the following plan.

Spanking
One Weekday Spanking

This spanking will occur sometime between Tuesday morning and Thursday night.  Mummy will come into your bedroom and spank you either right before bed or when you first get up in the morning.  This spanking will usually be a hand spanking, but will occasionally involve a wooden hairbrush or paddle. 

You are expected to cry and have to endure a sore bottom for several hours after your spanking.  Having to sit your sore bottom in your office chair all day should be a very effective reminder that misbehavior costs plenty in the end! 

• Sunday Afternoon Spanking

This spanking will be considerably harder than your normal weekday spanking.  This spanking will usually start with a good, hard hand spanking and always progress to a wooden hairbrush, wooden spoon or paddle spanking by the end.  This spanking will definitely leave you unable to sit down, which is why Mummy scheduled it for Sunday afternoons. 

By Monday morning, most of the pain in your bottom due your spanking will have faded away, but the lingering effects of your spanking should still be felt in your bottom.  The sting should make you very attentive to your work on Monday mornings.

Corner Time Punishment

Corner time is always performed with you prepared for bed.

Mummy will place you in the position that she wishes you to remain in for the duration of your corner time and you will stay there with a minimum of motion and sound.

Mummy will sometimes require you to hold an object with your nose during corner time.  If the object falls to the floor, you will receive a spanking with the hairbrush and start your corner time all over again.

• Before/After Your Spanking Corner Time

Whenever Mummy’s spanks you, you can expect to do corner time afterwards for a minimum of fifteen minutes.     

• Corner Time Display Punishment

Mummy will also use corner time as a punishment by itself.  When it is used, it has a minimum time of thirty minutes.

Sent To Bed Early Punishment

When Mummy sends you to bed early for punishment, you will always be dressed in baby style footed pyjamas.

Mummy’s New Punishments

Mouth Washed Out With Soap / Castor Oil Punishment

Mummy will now punish disrespectful comments of others and inappropriate language from you with a mouthwash consisting of liquid soap, spoonfuls of castor oil followed by a spanking and an early bedtime.

Line Writing Punishment

Mummy will now use long assignments of line writing to augment the lessons she is trying to teach you.  The ‘line’ will consist of a minimum of thirty words and a minimum of one hundred repetitions.

The lines will be hand printed in your finest handwriting.

Each line will be numbered. 

If you make a mistake, you are to cross out the line and rewrite the line using the same line number as the line with the error.  No single page may have more than three crossed out lines or the entire page must be redone.

Nap Times for Adults that Act Like Children

As Mummy noted before, she has a lot of evidence that you do not get enough sleep on a regular basis, so she gave you new bedtimes.   As a preventative measure to tiredness and irritability, she will now require you to take naps during the day.

A two to three hour long nap is a good way for Mummy to insure that you don’t become cranky in the afternoon.

Every Saturday and Sunday afternoon you will be dressed in your pyjamas and take a nap for a minimum of two hours right after your lunchtime meal. It is possible that you may just be kept in bed for the rest of the day, in effect your naptime become your bedtime.

Baby Sitting For Adults that Act Like Children

Whenever Mummy needs to go out for the evening, Miss Grabowski your old math’s tutor will baby-sit you. You will incur the cost of her wages plus her tip.

 Miss Grabowski supervision will begin by taking you to the bathroom and giving you a bath.  After your bath, she will dress you in pyjamas, nappies and plastic pants and you will remain in them till Mummy changes you out of them the next morning.

Miss Grabowski will then feed you your prepared dinner and proceed to give you a long, hard bare bottom spanking with a paddle or wooden hairbrush before she puts you to bed. Any misbehaviour by you while you are being babysat results in double punishment first by Mummy and then by Miss Grabowski.

Mummy hopes this regime will improve your behaviour considerably.

Naughty Babykins Chrissycuddles. This is another version of a "baby" story that I hope is to your liking!

I had been aware of Miss Kelly since she had arrived in the neighbourhood. The three-storey house at number 28 had been unoccupied for some time before her arrival. The tall, strong Nanny figure and the cowering person in the large pushchair I kept encounter daily in the park had intrigued me for a while. Talking to Miss Kelly on occasions I had perceived that the occupant of the carriages she pushed, hidden behind the plastic rain cover, was not all he seemed. He was usually well wrapped up regardless of the weather, wearing pale blue woollen mittens and a matching woollen hat that was always pulled well down, almost obscuring his face save for the omnipresent dummy that was permanently in his mouth. A blanket with a bunny rabbit appliqué was invariably tucked comfortingly around him too. Miss Kelly always rebuffed any attempt on my behalf to communicate and departed quickly.
I was confident I was privy to their secret and determined to find more about this unusual couple. I had a long-standing interest in such matters but was reluctant to broach the subject with her in the street. Now I was about to be afforded the perfect opportunity to satisfy my curiosity. We had met again in the park, despite the warmth of the spring day the pushchair inhabitant was securely clothed as usual. This time she paused and began to engage me in conversation.
‘It is Christopher’s birthday tomorrow,’ she told me, so, I knew his name. We walked on together; grunts that emanated from the pushchair told me Christopher was asleep. ‘There will be a small tea party to mark the occasion and I would like you to attend. I know you are curious about us and I also know now that you are the kind of woman who will, how shall I put it, appreciate my disciplinary methods? We shall expect you at three’.
“Of course, I will be delighted to come,” I replied, “just one thing, how old will Christopher be tomorrow?” I asked.
She turned the pushchair around and smiled as she began to walk away from me.
“Seventeen”, she replied.
I arrived at three on the dot. Miss Kelly greeted me warmly. Framed in the doorway I saw an attractive woman in her late forties who carried her height well. Her blouse and skirt were smart and functional without being frumpy, and she exuded a cool authoritarian demeanour that brooked no nonsense. To a younger person such as myself she personified the ideal of a traditional, disciplinarian Englishwoman. Miss Kelly invited me to take a seat while she went to fetch Christopher. ‘He doesn’t know you are coming so I expect it will be a big surprise for him. Perhaps you would put the candles on the cake for me?’ She gave me a knowing smile as she spoke, and left the room.
Taking a seat, I looked around and noticed lots of baby toys scattered around a soft play area. The coffee table in front of me was set for only two people; my suspicion that I was to be the only guest had been confirmed. The cake was decorated with icing and had ‘Baby’s Birthday ‘ piped upon it. I counted seventeen candles to put on the cake, and was looking forward to meeting the reclusive Christopher when I heard Miss Kelly’s voice. ‘Come along baby Christopher, time for your birthday surprise’.

She entered the room leading Christopher by the straps of leather baby reins that were adorned with tiny bells that tinkled delightfully as he toddled alongside her. It was at that moment he saw me and made a comical attempt to turn around and flee the room. Miss Kelly pulled up high on the reins and swung him around in front of her. She stooped down and picked him up effortlessly, carrying him on her hip toward me. His eyes blazed with embarrassment. In his mouth was a baby’s dummy, he sucked frantically at the teat. This young fellow was extremely embarrassed and humiliated at my witnessing his baby plight. He was wearing a toddler style white t-shirt with a picture of a cute teddy bear in the centre. But it was the lower part of his body that intrigued me the most. Crinkling at Miss Kelly’s touch was a pair of yellow plastic baby pants with what appeared to be more teddy bears imprinted upon them. What they could not disguise was that fact that they covered thick, snowy white towelling nappies. This particular seventeen year old was most definitely dressed as a baby, and what’s more he looked the part.
I estimated his height as about three foot eight tall and his weight at forty to forty five pounds, about your average five to six year old. Except, he was allegedly seventeen years old today.  He tried to avoid my gaze by trying to bury his face into Miss Kelly’s shoulders. She would have none of it; sitting him on a breakfast chair she clipped the straps of his baby reins to the back of it and swung a hinged tray around in front of him that she clipped to the other side of the chair. Baby was now securely on display in his high chair.
On his hands he wore the sweetest pair of knitted mittens, soft pale blue wool, with tiny yellow ducks embroidered upon them, on his feet, that swung helplessly below the high chair were matching bootees, tied with a pert, flourishing bow of blue ribbon.
Miss Kelly fastened a plain white towelling bib around his neck that had ‘Baby Christopher’ written across it in blue stitching.
She smoothed the bib with her hand and looking directly at him announced that it was time, “my ickle babykins had some Birfday cakey-wakey.”  I was surprised at her lapse into baby talk as her demeanour was that of a stricter, nanny type of carer.
She lit the candles and together we sang ‘Happy Birthday’. The poor boy was crimson with embarrassment as she removed his dummy and urged him to blow out the candles. He appeared reluctant, “now babykins, don’t be a naughty little ba-ba on your birthday. Do as you are told and blow out your candles.” She scolded.
That was more like the Miss Kelly I imagined. ‘What a clever baby you are,’ she cooed, reverting to baby talk as he reluctantly blew them out in two attempts.
‘Would you like to give Christopher his piece of cake?’ she enquired. ‘Ill just get you something to wear’.
She presented me with a white, starched frilly apron explaining that Christopher could be a messy eater. I tied on the crisp cotton garment and scooped a piece of cake onto a spoon and moved it toward his mouth. “No-No I don’t want it.” He said, in a squeaky infantile voice, refusing the cake by moving his head sideways.
 “ Hold his chin my dear, you must show baby who is in charge.”
As I grasped his chin, I noticed that his face was totally devoid of facial hair as was the rest of his body; indeed, he showed no sign of adolescence whatsoever.
I was slightly nervous and forcing cake into his mouth caused him to cough, crumbs cascaded from his mouth, making a mess on his clean bib.
‘Oh please...that's too fast.’ he spluttered, as the gooey and crumby substance smeared around his mouth. Miss Kelly interceded. ‘That’s quite enough grown up talk from you Mister Babykins, she scolded, wiping his face with the bib, ‘You deserve a smacked botty!’
‘No Nanny! Cwissie sowwy.’ He spoke in a sugary babyish voice, desperate, apparently, to avoid being spanked, especially I supposed, in front of a stranger.
 ‘Baby eat cakey all up’, he spluttered. He took the spoon from me with his mittened hands and plunged it into the cake.
Miss Kelly gave him a reproachful stare, then sat down and began to pour us tea, leaving Christopher struggling hopelessly to feed himself.
We chatted into the afternoon, Miss Kelly occasionally turning her head to keep a watchful eye on her beleaguered charge. I could only admire Miss Kelly: her neat skirt and blouse were devoid of creases, and her every movement portrayed strict, traditional values that are sadly now a thing of the past.
She spoke of how Christopher’s small stature was inherited but physically he was fine but perhaps because of his appearance he had become spoilt at home and became, as a teenager an attention seeker. With the police taking more and more of an interest in his antics, Miss Kelly, a family friend, had been asked to intervene and instigate a schedule of complete baby discipline for his own protection. She had determined the time was now right for Christopher’s training to progress, hence my invitation to his party. I told Miss Kelly of my own interest in petticoat and baby discipline, and how I had helped my mother infantilise my cousin Leonard one Christmas. It was an insightful conversation, one that was set to continue until Christopher became the architect of his own, new humiliation.
As we talked Christopher had given a stifled yawn. Miss Kelly turned quickly toward him. ‘Is my Chrissycuddles tired?’ she enquired in a syrupy voice. ‘Is it time for baby to get ready for beddy-byes?’
Immediately he desperately tried to sit up. ‘No Nana too thoon,’ he lisped, trying to look alert, ‘Cwissie not tired.’ The thought of being dressed for bed so early on his seventeenth birthday was provoking panic in his voice.
Unfortunately for Christopher, before he could protest further Miss Kelly had already lifted him out of his highchair and started to remove his t-shirt that she used to roughly clean the smeared chocolate cake from his face.
I was dispatched to the kitchen to prepare a bottle of baby milk, and when I returned Miss Kelly Christopher was completely naked sitting upon an old fashioned child’s potty. ‘Are we all done?’ she asked the squatting boy, ‘you know Nanny spanks naughty babies who don’t go potty before beddy-byes time.”
Poor Christopher was the picture of abject misery sitting there. She lifted him off the potty and proceeded to use a damp flannel to wash every part of his body. ‘No Nanny stop!’ he wailed, trying to avoid her thorough attention to his cleanliness.
Miss Kelly spoke angrily. ‘That’s quite enough, I warned you earlier about your big boys talk. You’re going straight to bed you naughty baby. Helen, would you please fetch me some clean nightwear for baby? His night-things are in the dresser in the nursery’. She continued diligently with her task, and I eagerly did as she asked while Christopher howled his disapproval at the rough flannelling he was getting and no doubt, his dismay at being destined for bed at such an early hour.
The nursery was decorated in shades of baby boy blue. Soft infantile toys lined a shelf upon which also stood young children’s bedtime story books. I easily imagined Christopher all tucked up in beddy-byes while Miss Kelly read him a bedtime tale.
It was the cot that dominated the room. Over the end rail was draped a long, blue winceyette sleep suit with elasticated cuffs at the wrists and the ankles, I held it up and wondered how Christopher would look in such an infantile item of sleepwear.
Remembering I had been told to bring clean nightwear, I went to the dresser. It was full of neatly folded babyish nightwear; I chose a pair of pale yellow, winceyette, traditional pyjamas with a Peter Pan collar that buttoned to the neck. The pattern consisted of two teddy bears dressed in blue striped pyjamas; Christopher would look so sweet wearing them.
Pausing only to pick up a teddy bear that was lying in the cot, I returned to find him lying on a changing mat being pinned into fresh fluffy white nappies. A pair of plastic pants printed with nursery characters was settled snugly over them.
 I handed Miss Kelly the pyjamas. ‘Oh, dear,’ she said smiling at me, ‘I’m afraid you have chosen baby Christopher’s least favourite pyjamas.” She turned to him and tickled his tummy, “Babykins thinks these lovely pyjamas are far too babyish for him but Aunty Helen and Nanny know different, don’t we? Yes we do, these jimmy-jams are perfect for our little babykins aren’t they Chrissycuddles?”
Christopher shook his head furiously. ‘But I'm not thleepy, I don’t want to go to beddy-byes'. His eyes brimmed with tears.
‘Aunty Helen has chosen these lovely pyjamas for you to wear, so you will be dressed in them by Nanny and then you will apologise to Aunty Helen for your behaviour’, ordered Miss Kelly firmly.
She put his arms into the sleeves of the jacket, buttoning it up to the neck. Placing his feet into the pyjama bottoms, she stood him up, pulled the bottoms up around his waist, and tucked the jacket inside the pyjama waistband. Christopher’s hands and feet had disappeared, enveloped in yellow winceyette
‘Now say you are sorry to Aunty Helen’ she said, giving his bottom a playful swat to send him on his way toward me. Christopher tottered unsteadily forward due to his bulky nappies and too large pyjamas. “I’m vewy sowwy for being naughty Aunty Helen,” he said softly with his head bowed. I leaned forward and gave him a big hug as he looked so miserable standing there contrite in nappies and pyjamas all ready for beddy-byes.
I scooped him up and cradled him maternally in my lap. Lifting the collar of his pyjamas I tied on a clean bib, as proffered by Miss Kelly, smoothed the collar precisely down again and slipped the teat of the bottle between his lips. The warm milk flowed as I rocked him gently toward impending sleep.
Christopher was only vaguely aware of the empty baby bottle being replaced with his dummy, and was practically asleep as I gently tucked his teddy under his arm. She put him into his cot and kissed him once on the forehead before raising the side rail. Miss Kelly and I quietly left the nursery to the sound of Christopher sucking contentedly on his dummy.
I looked at my watch; it was barely six o’ clock, and Chrissycuddles birthday party had come to an end.
I was invited back several times and I must say that Christopher was more helpless and infant like each time. Usually dressed in babyish nappies and pyjamas he spent most of my visits dozing in his bouncy chair.
Eventually, on what turned out to be my last visit there, Miss Kelly informed me that Christopher was going to live with two spinster sisters on the South coast. Reading between the lines it appears the two women had been introduced to Christopher and offered to “adopt” him.
I now know that he spent many years as their, “baby”, permanently kept in nappies, baby pyjamas and being put to bed at six pm every night. 

A naughty boy's birthday is ruined by his scheming younger sister

My Birthday Party In Bed

A story of undeserved bed punishment.

Written by: Janice

Copyright 2007

The sunlight is blinding, like a giant yellow ball of intense heat and light, high in the sky, with a few puffy white clouds floating by, since it is very early morning. As a result, the humidity is very high, and there lacks a breeze, which is already making the air sticky. It was going to be another muggy, yet beautiful and long summer day, and I was looking forward to every moment of it. Well, until my little sister intervened.

I had just showered and went downstairs fully dressed and suddenly Kaylee was arguing with me about my new MP3 player and other matters, and once again I played into her hand, which was unfortunate for me.

        -“John, why are you picking on your poor little sister?”

       -“Uh…er…I…I…I’m not…”

       -“Oh yes he is mom! He is being so nasty to me.”

Out of nowhere, mom showed up, declared me too cranky to be allowed to stay up. Being only five foot tall and weighing a mere hundred pounds, I was easily dragged upstairs by the ear by a very angry mom, while a very happy Kaylee stood at the bottom of the stairs holding her hand over her mouth making stifled laughs and acting very patronizing towards me; and mom did nothing about it.

       -“Night night baby brother. Aw, so crabby wabby you are…ha-ha, ha-ha”

       -“March young man. Upstairs to bed John, for a nap…” mom decreed with a serious air, but Kaylee would not relent.

        -“Can I help mom, oh please??”…Kaylee shouted from below.

        -“Yes of course! Since your older brother can’t stop picking on you he can suffer the indignity of his little sister getting him ready for bed…”

       -“Oh no mom, Not that! Please don’t let her…”

       -“Shut up and off to bed with you foolish boy. You need your rest!”

I marched along as mom twisted and held my ear so tightly that I grimaced in shame and pain. What did I do that was so bad? Why am I being treated like a child? Now mom tells me the only place for a cranky baby is bed and that’s where she is taking me, and I didn’t even have breakfast yet. I feel very angry, yet deeply ashamed. As we entered my room, I knew at any moment, our cousins, Adeline and Janessa were going to arrive and I was worried that they would find out I was being bed punished. Then I heard the doorbell, and more giggling voices. They had arrived. I am sure my sister was telling them what was occurring for the stifled laughter became loud and shrill. It is so unjust and unfair.

        Mom chided me, “You will stand before the window to see what you will miss, while I prepare your bed. Your sister will be up shortly!”

This is my birthday; I am 17 years old today, and here I am standing before my open window with hands on top of head, as mom prepares my bed. My thoughts are jumbled and I am confused. Why does mom always take Kaylee’s side? Why am I always to blame when she has one of her little girl tantrums? Why don’t others see it? My mother left the room for a moment, and I heard small footsteps on the stairs. It was Kaylee, giggling softly and acting in every way like a true plague of a little sister. Mom met her in the hallway and I heard whispering, and Kaylee bursting out in laughter. What was she up to now? Kaylee entered my room, just as mom finished folding back the bedcovers and fluffing the pillows. She had some garments in her arms and placed them on a chair. I was spun around and made to sit on the bed.

        -It’s time to get you dressed for beddy-byes John”.

       -Bu…but…but Kaylee’s here…. I can’t get dressed now….”

       -“Your little sister has seen naked little babies before, so this will be no different young man!”

Mom removed my shoes and socks and placed them in a pile. I had my shirt removed too. Then she pulled me up and undid my belt and snaps to my jeans and pulled them, along with my underwear, down. As I tried to cover up, Kaylee’s giggles and mocking comments tormented me. I stood before my mom and sister, I felt totally removed from the active world of an adult and reduced to the status of a naughty baby. Then the indignity happened as mom pulled the nightie over my head. It was one of Janessa’s left from a sleepover, a full length, pink floral, and long sleeved flannel nightie with a ruffle neckline. The nightie cascaded to the floor as mom turned me around do she could fasten the buttons at he back of the nightie before presenting me to Kaylee.

        -“What do you think of your baby brother now Kaylee?”

       -“Oh how very sweet? My baby brother is so cute, Hahaha”

Once dressed in the female nightwear, I became more complacent and submissive, but not by choice. I was then made to brush my teeth and attend to my toilet, before I was required to return to my bedroom. Next, mom ordered me to bed and lie down. Kaylee was asked by mom to help settle me in.

-“Oh yes of course. I would love to!” Kaylee responds with exuberance.

-“All comfy are we baby?” mom coos.

        -“But…I did nothing mom…” I cried in defiance. Mom’s point became more credible as I continued my distress. “You were nasty towards Kaylee and that’s enough for you to be put to bed wearing such a sweet little girl nightie.”

       “And you are just so cranky and you won’t even admit it!” Kaylee sneered.

       ”But she started her little girl whining on me mom! She demanded my….” Mom simply ignored my protestations that made me even angrier

       “ENOUGH! See how cranky you are?  And argumentative as well as defiant.”

       “But mom??...” I knew I made a mistake.

        -“See my darling son, how cranky you really are? That is why you argued with Kaylee and why I must put you to bed to calm down”

Mom attempted to sooth me with sweet talk and I couldn’t believe that Kaylee had so much power over mom. She was treated like a mature young lady, despite her little girl ravings while I was treated like a naughty baby. It wasn’t at all fair!

        “You will be sorry now John”. Kaylee whispers.

The next thing I knew, Kaylee had left the room and called for my two bratty cousins who sniggered and laughed out loud at an ear-splitting level, as they too, came up to my room. I felt this wasn’t necessary but after arguing again with Kaylee, mom invited them. She said that was my choice, and shortly I was surrounded by my mom, my 10 year old sister, Kaylee 14 year old cousin Janessa and 12 year old cousin Adeline. I felt really ashamed and embarrassed, yet angry and malicious. “Oh my goodness he’s is wearing my old nightie! “ Janessa exclaimed as she saw me in bed. “It really suits you John, “ she said as

Mom draws the shutters quickly, and suddenly the only light are the few concentrated beams of sunshine condensing through the thin slats of the shutters and dispersing into the room, like concentrated laser beams. My worries begin to escalate…

“There John, Mr. Sunlight is going nighty night too”. Mom ironically snickers and shakes her head.

 Yes; just…  like… you…” Kaylee deliberately said in a sing-a-long style in her annoying little girl manner.

        “It’s time to turn on your baby light, silly Billy!” Kaylee coos condescendingly, fluttering her eyelids and laughing. She notices that I am becoming increasingly perturbed at her childish treatment of me, that I cannot do anything about it, and yet mom does nothing to correct her. The cousins are gathering up my street clothes, now strewn upon the floor and leave the room with them.

-“Aw does baby miss mister sun? Aw too bad, cootchie, cootchie coo!”  Kaylee mimics in sugar-sweet baby talk, smirking deliberately.

-“I don’t think wickle ickle baby will see, oops, should see Mr. Sun for a very, very long time. Aw! Doesn’t baby like that? Still cranky are we?”

Kaylee then turns away and lights my bedside lamp, as mom instructs her to, awaiting eagerly the next step… Before that moment however, 8-year-old Janessa and 9-year-old Adeline returned from the laundry closet, having deposited all of my clothes and joined Kaylee in chiding me.

-“Oh look baby John. Your clothesy are all gone! Aw, does that make you sad?  “Too bad brat,” Janessa whispers in my ear giggling. “Hahaha”

-“Now you can sleep in peace, and you won’t have to worry anymore about them, snookums!” Adeline exclaims ironically.

-“That’s right baby! Your clothes are in a safe place where you cannot get them”. Kaylee scolds.

-“It’s past your bedtime John…” Mom decrees.

Mom appears to be deliberately oblivious to the cutting remarks, scorn and stifled giggles and taunts of the three little girls, as she opens my window just a bit. Then with one quick motion, she pulls down the shades. The dispersed laser beams disappear; however, the strong sunlight disperses light along both edges of the shades onto the walls and at bedside. Then with another swift motion, she pulls the very heavy blackout lined curtains tightly together and the sunlight disappears completely. The only light is emanating from the small bedside lamp and the natural light of the hallway outside the bedroom. It feels like midnight in my bedroom, with all natural light taken over by obscurity. I am somewhat perturbed, yet submissive as I sense what is happening…

        -“Not so bossy and tough now, are we babykins?”  Kaylee gloats in sheer exuberance at my visible sadness. The other girls snigger and stare.

I ignore her, though I would prefer to retort back. It makes me very angry, since she is a lot younger than me, and deliberately provoking me. Perhaps this is all a little joke to get me to stop picking on the girls. I certainly hope so. Okay then I’ll play along, and take a nap, but I somehow feel they have a different agenda for me, and then I become angry again.  I keep feeling mixed emotions, ranging from anger and resentment to sorrow and regret. What is most irritating for me, is these three young girls, my sister Kaylee especially, as she is years younger than me, who continue to taunt me to repentance, shame and humiliation.  Being put down for a short nap like a baby is one thing, but would mom listen to them and keep me here all day? Oh no, is she really is going to do this to me? I try to hide my feelings, but I fail as Kaylee catches me in a moment of regret.

        -“Is my big baby brother starting to regret being such a big bad meanie, is he now?” Kaylee scolds condescendingly. I am paralyzed to retort and she continues. “Well then, perhaps mom should put you to bed early more often”.

I breathed deeply. My sister seemed to have sealed my fate. And then mom spoke to me like an infant, as my heart dropped.

-“There, there John! All better now! Mr. Sun is gone again for yet another day. You will thank your sweet sister for your new curtains, as she was so kind in suggesting them, so that you can sleep in peace, without any daylight bothering you. You do remember the last time I put you to bed, don’t you?”  Mom comments amusedly.

-“Yes baby brother. I know I do!  You were so like crabby and cranky like a wickle ickle baby! And you whined… and complained…. And whined some more…” Kaylee decreed.

- …”That it was just too sunny outside to have to go to bed so early”.  Janessa finished stating.

-“Yes, yes, do you remember brother dear?? Well, worry no more, sleep a lot more! Hahahahahaha” Kaylee chuckled sarcastically along with her cousins. Mom then gave me a direct order.

-“ Now you big baby, it is time that you thank Kaylee, and I suggest you do it politely”. Mom orders with arms folded. I hesitate, but mom glares back and I relent unwillingly.

-“Thank you Kaylee!” I mumble pitifully. I really hate my sister, always provoking me. She is the reason I am tucked away in bed. I know it. And mom allows her to ridicule and mock me without consequence. Now she is looking at me scornfully.

-“Oh, my pleasure big baby brother, my pleasure, indeed! Kaylee adds in a patronizing and amused manner, and adds: “Now I shall give my big not so sweet baby brother a kissy wissy on his cheeky weeky!” She continued in syrupy mockery. Then Kaylee took out a stick of strawberry lipgloss and applied it heavily to her lips. She grinned and leaned over me again. I tried to evade her, by tossing my head back and forth, but to no avail. She kissed my forehead multiple times, knowing how much it annoyed me. The scent of her little girl perfume and that horrid lip-gloss lingered then she whispered softly to me: “Oh if I have my way, you will spend a lot more time in bed, and never see that girlfriend of yours ever again, sweet brother!”

I became worried, despite my arrogance, being older and my disdain for my little sister. Mom always believed her. I was the only one ever punished regardless of who started it, and she knew she had the upper hand. But then, I was interrupted by mom’s voice…

-“See Baby John how caring your sister is for you. You should be so ashamed for picking on her like you do”. Mom sternly stated ”Oh yes you should!”  But Kaylee was not so convinced.

-“Yes, shame, shame baby cousin” Adeline squealed in delight.

-“Oh I agree Adeline. Naughty, naughty wickle babykins…” adds Janessa.

-“Mom?? His apology was not as sincere as it should be….” Kaylee sighed with contempt.

-“I agree. Once downstairs, we will discuss his punishment for that”. Mom sternly replied. I then blurted out….

-“We? Why must you discuss me with them? That’s not fair mom! I’m already being punished”…I bellowed. Mom shook her head in disagreement. “You will be punished for your sulkiness downstairs this morning. I really don’t care if you want to act sulky and cranky, as long as you are sulky and cranky in bed, and not downstairs with us.”  Mom hisses. “And furthermore, for now you are in bed to calm you down.  We shall tell you your punishment later”.

-“Well must they be allowed to discuss it with you? Why mom??”

-“Because you continue your crankiness and sulking in front of your sweet sister and both your cousins. They have every right to be apart of your punishment. Now shut up”.  Then mom turns to the girls.

-You see girls; this is how a naughty little boy behaves; always teasing little girls. He rambles on and on like a grumpy baby, proving that he is over-tired and belongs in bed…. “

-“It looks like someone deserves some peace and quiet too!” Janessa declares.

-“And we need some too!” Kaylee interjects with enthusiasm. Then adds: “Maybe even for the rest of the day too!”

-“That would be wonderful!” shouts Adeline ironically.

-“Mom, will we tell him what his punishment will be?” Kaylee asks enthusiastically.

-“Perhaps, if he is not so sulky by then…. What’s the matter Kaylee?”

-“He needs a good spanking mother right now!” Kaylee interjects happily.

-“I agree. And then we need to get some breakfast…”

-“Oh yes mom! Oh yes…Can I do it? Oh please? And an apology too?” Kaylee shouts with amusement. Mom adds sternly with an amused grin.

-“I think you should!” She then turns to John. “Perhaps after being punished by your little sister, you just might start minding your manners in the future”. Mom laughs. John looks very unhappy.

‘-Oh goody! John’s gonna get a spanking. John’s gonna get a spanking!” Adeline wails in nursery chant.

‘”Way to go Kaylee! You rock girl! A good spankee wankee for a big bad baby waby. Smack him good and hard….” Janessa shouts and claps.

You naughty little baby, first you will stand before me, get moving now!” Kaylee commands. John hesitates, after all mom dressed him in an outfit that will prove to be very humiliating for him, and does not want to be seen by these little irritating and annoying girls. Mom uncovers him and pulls on his ear, making him get out of bed. The shrill laughter that followed made him feel very humiliated. 

-“Oh look, oh my…. that is like so funny…”Adeline giggles uncontrollably.

-“Yes but he looks so baby sweet in pink girls, moue Cheri?” Kaylee giggles.

        -Kneel down John”. She commands with amusement.

John does so and finds himself eye to eye with his little sister who is now in control, despite his older age. He finds this repulsive and not to his liking as she holds his chin and makes him focus on her face.  He resents her long black glossy fingernails as she gingerly makes him comply with her wishes.

        -: Now you will repeat each word I say and you had better act truly sorry”.  She mocks him sternly.

        -“I am truly sorry for upsetting my dear, sweet, kind and always good little sister!”  Kaylee recites, and then admonishes him. “I said every word now!”

       I am truly sorry for upsetting my dear, sweet, kind and always good little sister!” John mumbles unconvincingly, looking straight at Kaylee, then turning his eyes away.

        -“That was rude! Perhaps I should suggest to mom that you should stay in bed all… day… long… then.  Would you like that?  And miss your own birthday party? “ Kaylee ads sternly. As she holds my chin so I look up at her. “For now you shall get a spanking!”  A now very disturbed Kaylee scolds him amongst the giggles and mocking laughter.

-“Bend over the bed now, so I can spank you.” Kaylee commands. John does so, and his pink panty clad bottom is in full view of everyone. Mom hands her a long handled stiff bristled bath brush, and she accepts willingly.

-“This one is for mom, this one is for your dear sweet sister, and this one is for Janessa…”

Kaylee applies the bristles of the long hairbrush very hard across his now red and tender bottom. He winces at each blow and whimpers. After a number of blows, she stops reluctantly.

        -“I could go on and on, but I am hungry for breakfast and there is always later….” But Kaylee was not yet finished, and added with a sarcastic grin: “He still needs to be punished for his very bad apology mom!”

       -“I agree Kaylee, what do you suggest?” mom concurs. Kaylee walks over and whispers to her, while grinning straight at me.

       -“I want him to stay in bed for the rest of today. That would please me a lot mom! Oh please??”  The cousins heard her and shook their heads in agreement. John wondered what was being said.

       -“That would please us too!” giggled both Janessa and Adeline.

        -“Well we can discuss that downstairs when we plan his punishment as I said earlier”. Mom adds sternly.

Kaylee looked at me with a sniggering grin and chuckled. Then she addressed me:

-“You need a lot of rest baby brother…ha-ha -ha- ha”

Mom then interrupted.

-“We need to go now girls, our breakfast is waiting. And as for you John…. The girls have locked up your clothes. There is nothing for you to read, no TV to watch, no radio for you to listen to, no phone, and no clock… There will be no snacks, no visitors either…”

       -“ No talking, making noise, getting up, or staying awake once we leave you to sleep…” Kaylee adds. Mom folds her arms, shaking her head and looking very serious.

-“Do you understand?”

-“Ye…Y… Yes…But…”

-NO BUTS! It’s your bedtime now, so go to beddy-byes and sleep soundly. We will return after we have had our breakfast, perhaps or even later…. Now let’s go girls”.

-But can I get up, oh please? Don’t leave me here all day…. I want breakfast too… oh please??”

Kaylee looks back on him and shakes her head in disagreement. “Not if I can help it brother dear!” she sneers.

Mom stood at the bedroom door after kissing me. Kaylee grinned as she put on a heavy coating of that strawberry scented lip-gloss and advised her cousins to do the same. Then she kissed me again and again all over my face, despite my resistance and Janessa and Adeline filed her lead. I was covered in strawberry lip-gloss. I was then barraged with a cacophony of mockeries, giggles and condescending laughter that only served to annoy me even more. 

        -“Have a nice nap, baby cousin, or is it nighty night for you already?”

       -“Beddy-byes for cranky wittle babykins, cootchie, cootchie, sweetums!”

       -“Don’t let the bedbugs bite, nasty one. With you in bed, we can play better”.

Kaylee covers her brother up to his neck, and tucks in his many layers of blankets and comforters. Then she tells him what he is about to miss.

        -“Oh too bad you can’t join us for breakfast. We are having all your favorites like home fries and ham, eggs and sausage.  Mmmm, yum, yum for us, but bed is just so right for you anyway!”

       -“Time girls, let’s go.

The girls all left giggling and laughing.

-“It’s 8:45am John. Have a nice quiet nap, so we can enjoy our breakfast. No noise or you’ll be punished. It’s sleepy time for my naughty boy now! Night!” Mom scolds.

The door is swiftly closed, followed by the sound of a key being turned in the lock. The room goes from a well-lit one to a completely dark environment, by the closing and locking of the door. The sudden deadened room comes alive again with muffled wicked pre-teen giggling, laughter and mockeries from all three little girls, just outside my bedroom door. After much cacophony and jubilation about me, they descend back downstairs still laughing and making comments; their footsteps start to fade slowly, and the bedroom becomes very quiet and peaceful. Aside from the mockeries that fade quickly, it is almost deafening in the bedroom where I am now confined. They don’t seem to be concerned about me at all, or that I am to miss a great breakfast. Perhaps they will let me up shortly. I can only hope. But for now, I am still very angry and not at all happy with my forced situation. Then I turn my head slightly, and I can hear red robins whistling in the nearby trees, little children laughing and playing, lawn mowers, cars driving by, shouting, crying, laughing, music, dogs barking and all the wonderful sounds of people enjoying themselves.

        -“Aw too bad my wickle-ickle big baby brother has to go to bed, poor dear! NOT! (Giggle)”

        -“Oh yes, poor dear indeed! He deserves it and more. Come on, let’s go downstairs and play his new video games. At least now, he can’t bother us, oh goody!” Kaylee exclaims with mocking laughter.

        -“You are so right Janessa and Adeline. Oh sssh, its beddy-bye time for an older nasty boy, like who cares about him anyhow. We won’t have to worry about him pestering us anymore today, hurrah!”  Kaylee states jubilantly.

-“Now girls. It’s time to go downstairs and have some breakfast. More guests will be arriving and we need to be there to greet them. But during breakfast we can discuss a few matters concerning John’s punishment. Shall we?” Mom exclaims.

Their voices fade away soon after, as they head back downstairs. As I lay awake in my bed at only 9:00am, I am angry, yet sad bored yet annoyed and thinking of revenge, but leaning towards forgiveness. How did I ever get into this mess?  How could I allow this to happen? Okay I admit, most of the times I was callous towards my little sister, my cousins and her friends, but today I was not! I am not to blame. But nonetheless, mom blamed me anyway and at the insistence of those three wretched! Oh how I despise little girls!  This is the day of my birthday party and I am in bed? Oh that is so wrong! Oh no, my girlfriend was invited today. What will she say? What will she think? Oh no, come back, let me up, oh please, oh no, I can’s stay in bed, I can’t. I’m not a baby or naughty child though my little sister and cousins say I am. It is quieter now, as the laughter and mockeries of my two young cousins, Janessa and Adeline and my little sister, Kaylee fades away along with their footsteps as they head back downstairs. The silence is deadening. It is intentional I’m sure punished in complete solitude, all alone and in complete darkness. I am 19 years old! My sister Kaylee is only 10 years old, Janessa is 8 years old and Adeline is 9 years old. And these little witches got me in trouble. They are brats, I tell you. I am angry because of them.

It is not only extremely quiet in this room, but my clever mother and sister, had special window treatments made just for me. The shutters close and lock from inside, and then mother had made lined curtains in plaid for the room. The lining is a hermetically sealed material that blocks 100% of the sunlight from entering. And it works! It is so dark in here, I can’t see about the room, despite the fact that it is sunny and very hot outside. It is very hot in here too, covered by many layers of quilts and wool blankets, brushed cotton sheets and pillowcases. I am told they will help me to sleep faster, and they must work, because already, minutes after being left alone, I fall asleep…